Day 3: I play by my own rules

I'm a firm believer in making up rules as you go. For example, I LOVE to play rock, paper, scissors and just randomly whip out BULLDOZER! Now it's necessary that I capitalize that word because when playing, it must be yelled. Anyways...I'm applying this philosophy to my new diet as well. Today I ate my crappy protein breakfast, which was actually kind of good because I was so starving and ready to digest my own stomach that anything would have tasted good. I, once again, was starving by 8:30...so I drank a bunch of coffee which just made me super hyper. However I was working with my homegirl Donna so hyper is good when we work together. Thennn lunch was this veggie patty that was so full of rice I questioned whether or not it contained maggots. I'm going with the rice theory and thinking that even if I'm wrong I at least got a little extra protein. I didn't like it so I smothered it in ketchup. And contrary to what my dad has tried to tell me all my life, ketchup is NOT loaded with sugar. So I smothered that sucker up in some nice ketchup and cottage cheese and called it lunch. This may seem boring to you..if you don't know me. However if you DO know me, you  know that I usually consume a minimum of four lunches per day, preceded by two breakfasts. The fact that I have at this point only eaten 400 calories is something that I should DEFINITELY be given a tiara for.

Soo...now that it's time to get to the point, I became briefly discouraged today when I reminded myself that I currently weigh more than my dad. Yep, awesome. So I decided to order a pizza and think about how I can make some lifestyle changes that will result in drastic weight loss. It is here that we apply the "make your own rules" rule. New rule: I get one cheat day a week. It's Monday. It's a new week. Today is my cheat day. Awesome. So seeing as I won't be getting another cheat day for at least seven days, I decided to live it up. I only ate about 7 cookies, half a bagel, 3 pieces of pizza, and some candy (on top of my 1100 calories). So basically I am eating the same number of calories as I was before, I'm just cramming them all into one day. I'm considering becoming a lifestyle advisor.